There’s an impatience in our lives.  We’re technologically connected at the hip, (blue)tooth and thumbs.  We can update our information on Facebook, Twitter or Instagram to let those in our circle know instantly what or how we are doing.  So where’s the pixie dust and magic want to make mental health issues improve instantaneously?  In the words of the Beatles, you say you want a revolution?

Changes in mental health typically do not occur overnight.  I suppose there are some exceptions, but true change is more likely to be evolutionary than revolutionary.  That means that we can benefit from being patient and deliberate in our pursuit of mental health change.  Perhaps an applicable analogy is that we are our best guinea pigs for our own research – – we try something new (like getting more sleep at night, taking a mindful walk on a daily basis, or opening up to a trusted person) and observe over time if that helps.  If it does, then keep doing it.  If it doesn’t, then we try something else new that might be helpful.  The evolution of the improved and happier you will emerge in time, yet it may emerge along a timeline that is longer than that which you wanted.  Be patient, as only when we continue to work on building our foundation and working daily on these practices that enhance our mental health do we reap the long-term benefits.

I saw a quote recently and thought it was very appropriate for some of what we confront in the health field.  The saying goes, “If you do not make time for health you will eventually have to make time for disease.”  I believe this quote is appropriate for both mental and physical health – – that how we spend our time living our lives now directly influences how we will live our lives later.  I regularly speak about the benefits of routine mental health practices – – adequate sleep, taking time out for calm/relaxation (yoga, meditation, prayer, deep breathing), setting boundaries around our most important commitments while ridding our lives of unnecessary distractions, etc. – – and how those practices can impact optimal mental health functioning.  Physical health practices, such as regular low-impact exercise, appropriate nutrition and hydration, good posture and abstinence from smoking and excessive alcohol use, can also directly influence our bodies and quality of life.

I believe that the amount of time we spend focusing on good physical and mental health now is a more efficient use of our time compared to dealing with diseases later.  Furthermore, placing our efforts on good health practices today is enjoyable!!!  {Seriously, have you ever seen or heard anyone enjoy going to dialysis, having radiation or chemotherapy, or suffering through heart disease?}

Ask yourself this, “What am I doing regularly now to help maintain good health?  What can I do better to improve my health even more?”  Go for health now and enjoy the rewards!

I’ve been struct by the paralyzing force – – the incapacitating nature – – of indecision.  Acts such as looking for the best job, the perfect partner, or the optimal career path in college can lead to emotional debilitation and immobilization.  Sometimes, people are mired down by numerous imperfect options, and subsequently choose nothing.  “Paralysis by analysis.”  No taking action; only finding stagnation.

Choosing an imperfect path may be uncomfortable, yet it is an important step toward learning what you like, what you don’t, and how to move forward.  Making a decision and learning from it also teaches us of our amazing capacities to be more than we may have anticipated we could be.

“Be bold and courageous.  When you look back on your life, you will regret the things you didn’t do more than the ones you did.”  – – H. axon Brown, Jr.

Kids seem to learn something new all the time (although sometimes they learn things we don’t want them to know, but that’s not the point!)  Part of this learning comes from their willingness to try over and over again.

I’m reminded of this when I go downhill skiing.  Mountains that look daunting to me are tackled with ease by the ‘mogul mice’ on the same run.  The kids don’t seem to be thinking about all of the painful things that could happen if they fall or ram into the towering aspens and pines – – the kids look pretty fearless.  They are living in the moment, breathing the crisp air, enjoying the great outdoors and having fun.  Before the sun passes behind the mountain peaks, they may go down the same run 50 times in order to master their balance, speed and direction.  They are tenacious.

As we age, some of us can become impatient, wanting new skills and lessons to come more quickly and easily than they do.  Yet impatience can lead to significant frustration.  Perhaps, in our curiosity of the world, we can remind ourselves that our persistence in trying new things may pay off in the future if we give it ample time.

A river cuts through rock, not because of its power, but because of its persistence.  (Jim Watkins)

Teen Dating Violence Prevention Month is a national effort to raise awareness about abuse in teen and 20-something relationships and promote programs that prevent it during the month of February.  According to the CDC, teen dating violence is defined as the physical, sexual, psychological, or emotional violence within a dating relationship, including stalking. It can occur in person or electronically and might occur between a current or former dating partner.

Dating violence is widespread with serious long-term and short-term effects, including many that we have identified in our research, including depression, anxiety, body image concerns, eating disturbances, and increased risk for suicidal ideation and attempts. According to a 2013 survey, approximately 10% of high school students reported physical victimization and 10% reported sexual victimization from a dating partner in the 12 months before they were surveyed.

To learn more about what you can do to prevent dating violence or to help someone you suspect may be involved in an unhealthy relationship, please visit loveisrespect.org