Sometimes we hold magical beliefs. Such as, "If I brush my hair 100 strokes each day, then a hurricane won't hit where I live." And because no hurricane has hit where I live, I may believe that brushing my hair this much is working to keep me safe, and so I continue to brush my hair excessively to prevent a hurricane from hitting my home.

The problem with magical beliefs is that associations between two events can look real for no good reason. In the extreme example above, the more likely explanation for my hurricane "protection" is that I live in Minnesota and there has never been a hurricane in this area during my lifetime! If I were to test this magical belief, I would need to stop brushing my hair as often, perhaps not brushing my hair at all for a year or two, and evaluate whether a hurricane would then come to Minnesota.

The benefit to testing beliefs, and evaluating if they are magical is to break out of keeping ourselves confined to a narrower life, and break from thinking we are protected when we may not be.

Let's consider another example. A woman believes that by wearing several layers of clothing, even in hot weather, she is protected from a dog attack. She reviews history and notes that she has not been attacked by a dog since she started wearing extra clothing. She could become inappropriately "too comfortable" around dogs, thinking that the extra layers will protect her. As a consequence, she could inadvertently put herself in harm's way around an aggressive dog. To test the association between clothing and dog attacks, it would not be wise to put her in front of unruly attack dogs while wearing extra layers, but rather to help her wear more appropriate layers of clothing and practice caution around dogs she does not know or does not trust.

We should know whether beliefs in our life are based on facts. Knowing this information guides us to better decision-making, and can release us from a life that is suffocatingly narrow or unnecessarily risky.

Sometimes we need a push out of our nest in order to spread our wings and learn how to fly . . .

Why should we leave our comfort zones? Why not stick with those things that are familiar and known to us, and avoid taking risks? Why not stay in the safety and security of home?

. . . Because unless we are challenged outside of our comfort zones, we may not know that we can soar high in the skies. Is it time to take a note from the birds and kick yourself out of the comfortable, familiar nest to see if your life can take flight?

Bad things happen in life. You may not have planned for it and you certainly may not deserve it. Yet bad things happen. One of my heroes told me, many moons ago, the following advice: "You may not be able to choose what or when something bad happens to you, but you are definitely in charge of how you respond to it."

Do you curl up into a ball, pull the sheets up over your head and try to ignore the world passing you by? Do you drink yourself to oblivion in an attempt to forget? Do you impulsively retaliate against someone to try to even out the bad news?

Or do you take a few deep breaths, talk with a trusted person, and strategize how best to proceed? I am not suggesting that taking this approach is easy. But after years of working with clients and helping them navigate the bad news in their lives (as well as handling bad news in my own life!), I am confident that it is more favorable in the long run to be thoughtful and methodical about how to proceed - - whether it be by no action at all, or by a careful evaluation of what to do next. Afterall, if bad events are unavoidable, don't we deserve to make them the least damaging to our lives?

Vulnerable. Most of us avoid this feeling. We prefer to be comfortable and surrounded with people and places that are known to use. The familiar does have its benefits. However, in order for us to reach a greater potential, we need to journey outside of our comforts and be vulnerable. Yes, that does mean that we might be subject to being scared or we could inadvertently put ourselves in harm's way. Yet it also means that we could learn some news about ourself, such as a greater capacity for something. For example, hiking a mountain might make me vulnerable to a variety of physical problems (e.g., sprained ankle, broken limb, altitude sickness) and it also places me in positive "risk" for feeling an amazing set of accomplishments (e.g., pride in making it to the top of the mountain, awe in what the body is capable of doing, breaking down previously-held assumptions related to sleeping on a mountain in a tent and sleeping bag!). When we plan for a change and the change has a desired outcome, feeling vulnerable is nearly inevitable. Certainly you can take strides to reduce feeling too overwhelmed by involving trusted persons and planning methodical steps (not too large, not too little) in your change. Yet in order for the change to happen, it is not possible to avoid the feeling of vulnerability. See what you can do to make a change and embrace the daring side of you, and navigate that vulnerability with style!

It is likely that you have heard someone (perhaps an annoying teacher or parent!) say, "Practice Makes Perfect!" And it is also likely that you may have rolled your eyes when you heard that for the tenth or one-hundredth time. For the sake of an exercise, let's focus not on making things "perfect" but making them better. One of the most effective means to make significant and long-lasting changes in life is to make repeated attempts at that change. When you were younger, you didn't learn how to ride a bike or jump rope by doing it once - - you learned how to master these fun skills by doing them repeatedly. [I add the caveat that when we were kids, we likely enjoyed learning how to ride a bike or jump rope so it didn't seem like work at the time.] The reality is that practice is essential when we are interested in learning a new skill and having that skill become part of our life. Take a look at what you are interested in learning at this point in your life, and see if you can carve away a little bit of time on a regular (weekly, if not daily) basis to practice . . . and then evaluate how far you have come over the course of a month!

I'm regularly asked what recovery looks like, whether it be recovery from depression, an eating disorder, a loss such as a divorce or a death, or similar experiences. I'm not certain that I have the perfect answer, but here is how I think about recovery. I view recovery as a journey, not a destination. What I mean by that is that you don't get to the point of not having any symptoms (of depression, grief, or an eating disorder) or returning to your normal baseline of functioning without having worked very tediously to get there! Thus, while it is a time to celebrate the achievement of abstinence it is not a time to stop doing what you have been doing. Rather, I believe it is quintessentially important to keep doing those things that have helped you!

You have probably heard the quote by Albert Einstein that "the definition of insanity is doing the same thing over and over again." Certainly, many people want something to be different in their life. What they may underestimate is the amount of time, energy, deliberation and focus that goes into reshaping it. But do not lose hope...if you keep yourself focused on the ultimate goal but break the task down into smaller, manageable steps, change can happen! Consider this example: If you are hiking up a mountain, you can look up at the top of the mountain from time to time to remind yourself why you are exerting a tremendous amount of energy on the climb so that you can cheer once you reach the top. Yet in order to reach the top of the mountain you need to spend most of your time focused on the five feet in front of you so that you retain your footing and balance. If your eyes are constantly gazing at the top of the mountain, you may not "see" that you are getting very far and you may lose your balance and tumble back down. However, when your eyes bear witness to the steps that you have mastered and the distance you have already traversed, you may feel energized to keep going. Be purposeful in the alterations that you want to make in your life, yet break them down into smaller, more manageable parts in order to reduce the likelihood that you will become discouraged along the way.

In the US, 1.5 million teens experience dating abuse each year. Young women ages 16-24 experience the highest rates of violence-nearly triple the overall average. If girls are to live free from violence and fear, we must empower them to speak out on their own behalf. The Pepsi Refresh Project is providing funds for organizations to do something amazing and Break the Cycle, a nonprofit dedicated to empowering youth to end domestic violence is contending for these funds. With $250,000, Break the Cycle will invite 120 Girl Scouts ages 15-17 and 40 female college-students to become peer ambassadors against dating abuse. Participants will travel to Washington, DC for a 2-day training to become leaders in this movement! Over the next year, these young women will educate and inspire other Girl Scouts in their region, using service-learning activities to help over 50,000 girls. Charged by their peers to educate five others, these 50,000 youth will help give a total of 250,000 young people the life-saving knowledge needed to create safe, healthy and happy futures.

Please help us give all teens the right to safe, healthy relationships by voting for Break the Cycle's project; click here now!

Are you STUCK? Jammed into a rut and not going anywhere? While being stuck is a place to be, and may be better than going backward, you can still work toward becoming unstuck. Ask yourself, "what are the factors that are keeping me stuck - which ones can I change, and what is my plan to change them?" Sometimes I hear clients say, "It seems like every time I take a step forward, I later take a step back." If this is your situation, what I want to know is, "Which way are you facing - - are you facing forward, striving for positive change and recovery? Or have you turned around, seemingly given up on progress?" Even if you are feeling stuck, keep your eyes focused forward and try hard not to give up on making changes.... positive events may happen even if you aren't expecting them!!!

'Tis the season again - numerous holidays, family gatherings, plentiful feasts and delicious treats and all that is joyous, right? It is my wish for you that you have a happy and wonderful holiday season. But for those of you who feel stressed, depressed, down due to the dark and cold days, or otherwise in a funk, please consider giving the following gift to yourself.

NURTURE YOURSELF. Perhaps it's a nap, a pedicure, quiet time spent with a favorite book or hobby, a phone call to a close friend or a few moments sipping hot cocoa by a fire... whatever your indulgence, give yourself the gift of calm, soulful, positive nurturing.

I saw this quote today and thought it was very appropriate for some of what we confront in the health field. The saying is: "If you do not make time for health you will eventually have to make time for disease." I believe this quote is appropriate for both mental and physical health - that how we spend our time living our lives now directly influences how we will live our lives later. I regularly speak about the benefits of routine mental health practices - - adequate sleep, taking time out for calm / relaxation (such as with yoga, meditation, or prayer), setting boundaries around our most important commitments while ridding our lives of unnecessary distractions, etc - - and how they can impact optimal mental health functioning. Physical health practices, such as regular low-impact exercise, appropriate nutrition and hydration, good posture and abstinence from smoking and excessive alcohol use can also directly influence our bodies and quality of life.

Although I have no scientific evidence supporting this next assertion, I believe that the amount of time we spend focusing on good health now is a more efficient use of our time compared to dealing with diseases later. Furthermore, placing our efforts on good physical and mental health practices today may be enjoyable!!!! [Seriously, have you ever seen anyone enjoy going to dialysis, having radiation / chemotherapy, or suffering through heart disease?]

Ask yourself, "What am I doing regularly now to help maintain good health or even improve my health for later?"

I experienced an incident this week that reminded me to write on setting boundaries. I was out for a walk and running short on time when I was approached by a reporter and cameraman for a local news station. Before the reporter could ask her question, I said to her, "I'm sorry, but I'm busy with something else right now and don't have time for questions" and continued walking. She reacted quite negatively, throwing her hands into the air with a huff and loudly exclaiming "Well, S O R R Y to intrude upon your walk! I just wanted to ask you one question about the construction!"

When we set boundaries that are reasonable for us, it does not mean that others will receive it well or respect the boundary. Yet it is important for us to maintain our personal boundaries, not giving in to others who display disrespect or disagree with the limit that you have set. Furthermore, if you identify people in your life who regularly disrespect the boundaries that you set, perhaps the boundary needs to be larger and stronger by choosing not to be around those individuals.

One way to evaluate if your boundaries seem to be reasonable is to play the "third party person" twist. Imagine that a friend of yours is telling you that he or she set this boundary with someone else. What would you think of that boundary for them? Does it seem reasonable, logical, and appropriate? If so, it's likely that the same boundary is reasonable, logical and appropriate for your use as well. Try some boundaries on and see how they feel for you (it can be nerve-wracking at first if you are not used to it, but with time it should become easier).

Please consider giving a small donation ($25 or more) to Break the Cycle's Brick Campaign to end Dating Violence. Dating violence harms one out of every three teens in the United States. You can do something to lower that number. Join me in building thesafespace.org - a virtual environment that provides teens the opportunity to ask questions, share stories, and get advice. Please buy a brick!

Wellness is defined as the state or condition of being in good physical and mental health whereas illness is a disease or period of sickness affecting the body or mind. Looking at the spelling of these two words, the letters in common are the ones at the end ("llness"), yet quite interestingly, what differentiates these two words from one another are the beginning letters - WE versus I. WE*llness is often achieved by building a community of individuals (the "we") who can support our health, growth and strength. Yet when we become individually focused and do not involve others around us (the "I"), we may be prone to I*llness in that our internal focus may lead us astray in terms of our goals and we could become exhausted if we do not have those around us to guide, nurture, uplift, and empower us to reach greater heights. To be well, take a careful look around you to see who can be part of your team - who can support you - who may be able to help you reach your greatest potential - and involve them in your life so that you can achieve WE*llness.

The issue of change obviously comes up frequently in psychotherapy, as therapy is geared to help people make the changes necessary to improve their lives. Most changes are not easy, in fact they are accompanied by a healthy dose of fear and trepidation, and a wheelbarrow full of "what if" questions. What if a change is made and life is worse afterward? What if it doesn't work? What if it does work and I am more miserable than before? Although graduate schools have stopped giving out the crystal balls and magic wands (drat!) that would allow psychologists to see the future and make all pain go away, it is still necessary, in fact essential, to take leaps of faith in life instead of remaining paralyzed by fear. Afterall, without change, one would be relegated to having the same misery in life repeat itself over and over.

What fears are preventing you from making the changes you need to make in your life? How can you overcome these fears, using the tools that you have learned that help you calm your anxiety? What dreams can you seek to attain, even if slowly and in a step-by-step fashion, if you fight being paralyzed by fear?

The impossible exists only because one was afraid to chase after their dreams. - - Sarah Ruth

Youth today have many options for procuring health care information. In addition to physicians and nurses, parents and friends, they also have access to a wealth of information on the internet. In 2001, we surveyed a nationally representative sample of 5th through 12th grade youth in the US to understand where they were obtaining their health care information. Over half of boys and girls said that they turn to their parents and/or a doctor or other health professional for health care information. Yet approximately 25-33% of youth also noted gleaning health care information from potentially unreliable sources, such as magazines, television shows, newspapers and the Internet. Of further concern is that 10% of youth said they did not know where to get health care information.

The survey also asked if there were topics that adolescents would be too embarrassed, afraid or uncomfortable to discuss with their health care provider. Over one-third of boys and girls reported that they would be too embarrassed, afraid or uncomfortable talking about physical or sexual abuse, menstruation (girls only), body changes and sexuality.

The health care of youth is too incredibly important for these issues not to be discussed, or for teens to turn to unreliable sources for their health care information. I believe this means that we need to be better advocates for adolescent health care, asking youth appropriate questions and providing them confidential opportunities to discuss sensitive topics. This can be accomplished by health care professionals and others by establishing a good rapport, taking time out to listen to teens, assuring and maintaining confidentiality, and helping them access appropriate information as needed.

There's an impatience in our lives. We're technologically connected at the hip, (blue)tooth and thumbs. We can update our status on Facebook to let our friends know instantly what we are doing. So where's the pixie dust and magic wand to make mental health issues improve instantaneously? In the words of the Beatles, so you say you want a revolution?

Changes in mental health typically do not occur overnight. I suppose there are some exceptions, but true change is more likely to be evolutionary than revolutionary. That means that we can benefit from being patient, and deliberate in our pursuit of mental health change. Perhaps an applicable analogy is that we are our best guinea pigs for our own research - we try something new (like getting more sleep at night, taking a mindful walk on a daily basis, or opening up to a trusted person) and *observe* over time if that helps. If it does, then keep on doing it. If it doesn't, then we try something else new that might be helpful. The evolution of the improved, happier you will emerge in time, yet it may emerge with a timeline that is longer than that which you wanted. Be patient, as only when we continue to work on building our foundation and working daily on those practices that enhance our mental health do we reap the long-term benefits.

Goals can be excellent things for us to have. They can guide us toward our future, toward changes that we want to make, and toward accomplishments we seek to achieve. But goals can also set us up for defeat if they are too lofty. Ideally, goals should be "smart" goals. What do I mean by that?

S = Specific
M = Measurable
A = Achievable
R = Reasonable
T = Time-limited

For example, someone could have a goal such as "I want ten thousand dollars for a house downpayment." Without a reasonable plan, it might seem daunting and frustrating on a daily basis to think about the $10,000 that you want, but not have a good solid plan for obtaining it or demonstrate any progress toward having it.

A "smart" goal might be something like "I plan to place $200 each month into an interest-earning, low-risk account. In 4 years, I should have accumulated the ten thousand dollars for my downpayment on a house." The second goal, of saving $200/month over a period of 4 years, is very specific, is measurable in the number of dollars, might be achievable with the correct budgeting, is reasonable and not too lofty, and has a time-limit, thus making it a "smart" goal.

When you set goals for yourself, use the acronym above to guide you toward setting goals that are SMART, and then have fun achieving those goals!

Think for a moment about children at play. In their play states, they are often creative, happy, laughing, less inhibited, more daring. Do we grow out of play as we age? Do we learn to become so overly cautious and self-conscious that we forget how to free ourselves from our adult responsibilities just to have fun? Yet, wouldn't it perhaps lift our spirits to go run in a park, plop down on a swing and soar into the sky, propel on a scooter, or play a lawn game? Whether you be around kids or not, challenge yourself to join in the fun of play, letting your body feel free, your mind be unburdened by responsibilities just for a few moments, your chronological clock to run backwards a few years. Enjoy the moments, play, and seize the day.

Recently at a conference in Seattle, there was a very interesting and dynamic discussion about defining recovery in the mental health field. On a simple and tangible level, we look for remission from the primary symptoms being treated. Yet on a more complicated (and in my opinion, meaningful) level, we look for the quality of life to be significantly improved. While achieving a symptom-free life is a significant accomplishment, it does not in and of itself mean that life is enhanced. It does provide a more solid foundation for building a stronger life with greater value and meaning, and that can weather future storms. Keep this in mind when you are working so hard - that each day you are able to be symptom-free you are strengthening your life's foundation.

I went to an outstanding seminar yesterday, "Advances in the Integrated Treatment of Trauma," taught by international expert John Briere, PhD. He shared a wealth of important clinical conceptualizations and treatment paradigm shifts for all in the room.

Dr. Briere highlighted how important it is that when we are around those who have been traumatized (physically, sexually, and emotionally including emotional neglect), we understand how much traumatized people are hurting. He emphasized this point by talking about an invisible bear trap. If you are walking down the street and accidentally step on an invisible bear trap and its jaws snap around your ankle, you are going to be in tremendous pain. You might jump around, scream out loud, wave your arms in the air, try to grab someone walking by to help you, etc. But if this invisible bear trap is in fact invisible, others won't be able to see it. What they may see is a 'crazy' person and try to get away from you, leaving you alone in your suffering. If they can't see the bear trap, they aren't likely to understand your reactions and be able to empathize with you and help you when you're in so much pain. As difficult as it is to talk about painful and traumatic events, doing so helps the pain and suffering become visible and more understandable to others, thus boosting their ability to extend compassion, warmth, and assistance. Which trusted person in your life might need to know more about your invisible bear trap so they can better understand and help you?

It's rare that I get to blog on leap day - what fun! Let's do something special and unique to celebrate this precious 'extra' day that we get. Let's 'leap for joy' - but what is joy? Here are some quotes that describe others' definitions of joy:

Joy is prayer - joy is strength - joy is love - joy is a net of love by which you can catch souls. - - Mother Theresa

I define joy as a sustained sense of well-being and internal peace - a connection to what matters. - - Oprah Winfrey

Learning to live in the present moment is part of the path of joy. - - Sarah Ban Breathnach

There is no greater joy nor greater reward than to make a fundamental difference in someone's life. - - Sister Mary Rose McGeady

We could never learn to be brave and patient, if there were only joy in the world. - - Helen Keller

What I glean from the aggregate of these quotes is that joy is palpable because we have known hardship yet is always within us, is felt in our meaningful connections with others, and is enhanced when we positively affect the lives of those around us including the lives of you and of me.

So be courageous on this special day and seek out some joy. Be still in your soul and true to yourself and your health. Find that warm, valuable, mattering spot in your heart and identify one way that you could bring joy to your life. See what happens when you act on it!

In my discussions with parents, I hear the distress in their voice, wondering if they are making a difference in the life of their son or daughter. They ask questions like how to help their kids handle teasing, avoid substance use, feel confident and build solid self-esteem. While the answers to these complex questions may take time to implement, one thing remains true - parents can make a difference. As we found in a 2006 study, adolescents who perceive that their parents (mother and/or father) care about them, feel as though they can talk to them, and value their opinions (even if they don't heed the advice!) are adolescents who have stronger mental health. These are the adolescents who are less likely to experience depression and low self-esteem. They are also less likely to use substances, engage in unhealthy weight control behaviors, and attempt suicide. Parents can make significant strides toward helping their kids feel valued by taking time on a regular basis to listen with full attention, making eye contact during conversations, and refraining from quick judgment or providing solutions to the problem. Focus instead on holding a discussion in which pros and cons of many solutions to a problem are discussed, and seek to help the young person make an appropriate decision on his or her own.

Over a decade ago, when I was establishing my private practice, my father asked me what my goal was for it. I don't know what answer he expected. Perhaps it was about growth in appointments or income, or about professional activities outside of the private practice. I never asked what he had in mind, but I do know that he was more than a little surprised by my answer! I told him that my ultimate goal for private practice was to go out of business!! And the reason I want to go out of business is because the need for the type of services I provide is gone - for people to feel amazing all the time, take great care of themselves, and not hurt others. If that happened, psychotherapy as a profession might just disappear. Wouldn't that be amazing? Perhaps it's a lofty goal (I may be a dreamer), but will you help me achieve it?

It's important to be cautious yet realistic about what we expect from others. Evaluate what you think a person can provide, and tailor your expectations to those observations. Just because a person isn't able to provide one thing doesn't mean that they aren't highly valuable for another need. You don't go to a dry well for water, but you may go there to sit and rest, partake in the shade. When we correctly determine which valuable people can meet our expectations for one need versus another, we are more likely to be satisfied with our relationships.

I just came back from a really interesting and exciting vacation exploring three main parts of Chile... but I have to tell you about one of the highlights - Easter Island. Easter Island (Isla de Pascua) is a teeny island in the Pacific Ocean, very remotely located far, far from other lands. The native inhabitants are known as the Rapa Nui people. At dinner one night, I was so fortunate to have the amazing opportunity to sit next to a native Rapa Nui woman whose name is Tina Maria. She told me many fascinating stories about her people, and one that I found highly interesting is that the Rapa Nui language has no future tense. They don't plan in advance. They can't talk about what lies ahead. They have no language for worrying about what will happen tomorrow. They can only address what is happening now and what has happened in the past. As I wondered what that would be like, I also remembered that optimal mental health encourages us to focus on the present. This may be more challenging in a culture that does focus on the future but perhaps we can challenge ourselves to live in the moment.

Many of us are pretty good at basic maintenance. We have the oil changed in our cars when it's due, we have our teeth cleaned every 6 months, and perhaps we even change the air filter in the furnace and replace the batteries in the smoke detectors once a year. All of these tasks are designed to keep things running smoothly and prevent problems. Yet it's not so clear to us what practices might improve our mental health. We're not born with engine lights that tell us when some part of us is overheated or broken, nor calendars that tell us when our next vacation is due (but wouldn't that be nice?!). Instead, we can benefit from a "check-up from the neck up" - checking in with ourselves to evaluate how we are doing and feeling. Try these questions:

• How regularly are you sleeping? How many hours each night? Do you sleep soundly or not?
• Are you eating enough, or eating too little? Open your cupboards and refrigerator - do the contents look like you want them to?
• Is there time for exercise, reflection, meditation in your life?
• How would you rate your connections with others? Frequent enough, too often or just right? Superficial or deep?
• Are your finances and chores up to date? Or are things slipping behind you?
• Do you engage enough in activities that make you feel good - such as whimsy, hobbies, volunteering, spiritual activities, visiting with special persons?

Conduct a "check-up from the neck up" to evaluate how you are doing. If you find that you are "off" on a number of the answers to the questions above, perhaps it's time to slow down and evaluate your priorities. Can someone help you get re-aligned? What responsibilities can you give to someone else or get rid of altogether? What priorities need to shift in rank? Monitoring our behaviors, thoughts and feelings on a regular basis helps us identify problem areas so we can get a tune-up. Try a "check-up from the neck up" on a weekly basis and see what you find out about yourself!

Collaborations with my colleagues at the University of Minnesota have allowed us to investigate several factors on problems associated with sexual and physical abuse (emotional abuse and neglect are likely associated with the same problems, but weren't included in the survey).

In 2001, we were discouraged when we learned that 18.1% of girls and 11.9% of the boys studied reported being physically and/or sexually abused. Abuse was significantly associated with binge-eating and purging behavior. It was further upsetting to learn that less than a third of abused youth chose to talk with someone about the abuse. Our findings suggested a trend toward those who talked with someone being less likely to engage in binge-eating and purging behavior. Of those who did decide to discuss their abuse, they most often turned to a close friend, a parent, or another trusted adult.

Sexual and physical violence have multiple negative effects, including but certainly not limited to eating disorder behaviors. Talking about the abuse may reduce shame and lessen emotional distress related to the abuse, however it's essential to find safe, trusting, and accessible environments and persons to approach about these difficult issues. If you or someone you know has been abused, please seek help from someone you trust.

Consider that your mental health is like a bank account. For a higher balance (stronger mental health), make regular deposits (self-care) that are larger than the withdrawals (stressors, demands, genetics, etc.) in order to avoid overdrafts (such as significant depression, anxiety, using unhealthy coping skills like drinking or binge-eating) and to build a buffer zone for times when you may need to make larger withdrawals.

Did you know that in the middle of the 19th century mental health used to be called mental hygiene? Hygiene is defined as conditions or practices conducive to maintaining health and preventing disease. I think it communicates that active participation on our parts can help us have better psychological health.

If you didn't brush your teeth or floss for a year (ick!), would you expect that your teeth would be fine? Of course not. Nor should we expect that if we are regularly stressed, overcommitted, sleep-deprived, and overwhelmed that we'll be fine.

What would your mental hygiene comprise? What would you need to have or practice on a daily or weekly basis in order to be at your best psychologically? Go ahead and try it out - see if it makes a difference if you develop regular practices for optimal mental health....

Because of my clinical work in eating disorders, which predominantly affect younger individuals, I have had the joy of working with many adolescents. Yet I have been alarmed in hearing of numerous unhealthy dating experiences, either their own or those of their friends. Subsequently, one of my primary areas of focus has been on adverse dating experiences among adolescents.

• In 2002, we published the largest study to date on adolescent dating violence. In a survey of over 81,247 Minnesota youth, we found that a worrisome 9% of girls and 6% of boys had experienced either physical or sexual violence by a dating partner. Of further concern, dating violence was found to be associated with higher rates of disordered eating behaviors (such as binge-eating, fasting or skipping meals, taking diet pills, self-induced vomiting, and taking laxatives) and suicidal thoughts and attempts, and lower scores on measures of emotional well-being and self-esteem. Visit the American Psychological Association's press release for this article.
• In 2003, we published a follow-up study of over 3,000 youth who completed the Commonwealth Fund Survey of the Health of Adolescent Boys and Girls. With this nationally representative population-based sample, and using a different definition of physical or sexual violence by a dating partner, our findings showed that an alarmingly high 17% of girls and 9% of boys reported adolescent dating violence. Dating violence was found to be associated with a broad range of behavioral and mental health risks, including dieting, binge-eating and purging behaviors, cigarette smoking, alcohol consumption, drug use, suicidal thoughts, depression, and poorer self-esteem for both girls and boys. Of particular concern was our finding that approximately 50% of girls and boys who had experienced physical and sexual dating violence also reported staying in relationships out of fear of physical harm.